Sunday, June 27, 2004
Taking masters classes is the epitome of lame.
So here's the plan. After I finish my master class I will...pay attention here...*never do anything I don't want to do again*. This, like many things, is just a theory, but it's the one I'm running with at the moment. Life is a short and strange thing, and I'd like to think I can carve my own path in it well enough to keep me, and the people aroudn me, happy.
But I'm starting to think this masters degree was a mistake. It is true that a lot of people at Raytheon have it, but the 'all your friends jumping off a cliff' argument applies here. It's keeping me from doing the things I want to do, from learning the things I want to learn. I want to learn to play the drums, I want to write music and a novel, I want to learn to ride a motorcycle, and I can't because I spend too much time doing these stupid classes.
The payout is money, eventually. And I'm not going to proclaim myself so high-and-mighty that money doesn't matter to me. Money doesn't buy happiness, but it does by food and water and an apartment in which I can live while I pursue happiness. If I had all the money in the world, I wouldn't have to work, and then I'd have time, and that's precious.
But this masters degree just eats up my time. I can't do everything I want to do. And If I don't do it now, when am I going to do it? I have to learn japanese. I want to go to another country. Maybe I want to move there. Oop, sorry, can't. I've got homework to do. What an absurd excuse.
Working is okay, though. I wouldn't do it if I didn't have to, but I do it well, and the effort isn't so bad that it offsets the paycheck. I like stability, and having a steady source of income does that for me. So that's good. I'll keep working.
Unfortunately, I'm locked in to my masters degree. I've committed myself to it. I applied to USC, I'm in the fellowship program. I'm in and I'm stuck. So I'll push my way through it. It's not like there's no reward on the other side. That's good news, at least.
But when it's done, so am I. No more masters means I can fill the time with fun things. Video games? Perhaps. I like them. I really really do. I don't judge your hobbies, don't judge mine. If you can find a thing that makes you happy, really happy, it's precious. Hang on to that. I'm not sure I understand myself well enough to know what kind of thing my happiness is, but I have a corner of it at least, I might as well start building a house off there.
Now served: One Blog entry a la 'Stream of Conciousness'. I just finished my homework, and I have a midterm on monday. I'm actually a touch concerned about it, I'm confused about the material in a way that I rarely am. I'm going to give it a good, hard studying over the coming days, though, see if I can't get my fingers into some of the cracks. The grade is curved though, so I just have to do better than everyone else. Heh.
What else. Played some video games, City of Heroes (CoH) is awesome. Met Rob online in CoH. Which is cool. He told me Thom's On too, so hopefully I'll run into you too, okay Thom? And if there's any of you out there who are also online with CoH, let me know. And if you're not, *GET IT*. It's great fun. Even you, Nana. If I've got a grandmother who's 'with it' enough to be using *Acronyms* in her e-mails, you're only a few steps away from hitting up the video games. You'll be Punkbusting n00bz in no time. :)
Does anyone ever browse the things I link? Just curious.
Time is short. More studying, more playing games. Ta!
-N
So here's the plan. After I finish my master class I will...pay attention here...*never do anything I don't want to do again*. This, like many things, is just a theory, but it's the one I'm running with at the moment. Life is a short and strange thing, and I'd like to think I can carve my own path in it well enough to keep me, and the people aroudn me, happy.
But I'm starting to think this masters degree was a mistake. It is true that a lot of people at Raytheon have it, but the 'all your friends jumping off a cliff' argument applies here. It's keeping me from doing the things I want to do, from learning the things I want to learn. I want to learn to play the drums, I want to write music and a novel, I want to learn to ride a motorcycle, and I can't because I spend too much time doing these stupid classes.
The payout is money, eventually. And I'm not going to proclaim myself so high-and-mighty that money doesn't matter to me. Money doesn't buy happiness, but it does by food and water and an apartment in which I can live while I pursue happiness. If I had all the money in the world, I wouldn't have to work, and then I'd have time, and that's precious.
But this masters degree just eats up my time. I can't do everything I want to do. And If I don't do it now, when am I going to do it? I have to learn japanese. I want to go to another country. Maybe I want to move there. Oop, sorry, can't. I've got homework to do. What an absurd excuse.
Working is okay, though. I wouldn't do it if I didn't have to, but I do it well, and the effort isn't so bad that it offsets the paycheck. I like stability, and having a steady source of income does that for me. So that's good. I'll keep working.
Unfortunately, I'm locked in to my masters degree. I've committed myself to it. I applied to USC, I'm in the fellowship program. I'm in and I'm stuck. So I'll push my way through it. It's not like there's no reward on the other side. That's good news, at least.
But when it's done, so am I. No more masters means I can fill the time with fun things. Video games? Perhaps. I like them. I really really do. I don't judge your hobbies, don't judge mine. If you can find a thing that makes you happy, really happy, it's precious. Hang on to that. I'm not sure I understand myself well enough to know what kind of thing my happiness is, but I have a corner of it at least, I might as well start building a house off there.
Now served: One Blog entry a la 'Stream of Conciousness'. I just finished my homework, and I have a midterm on monday. I'm actually a touch concerned about it, I'm confused about the material in a way that I rarely am. I'm going to give it a good, hard studying over the coming days, though, see if I can't get my fingers into some of the cracks. The grade is curved though, so I just have to do better than everyone else. Heh.
What else. Played some video games, City of Heroes (CoH) is awesome. Met Rob online in CoH. Which is cool. He told me Thom's On too, so hopefully I'll run into you too, okay Thom? And if there's any of you out there who are also online with CoH, let me know. And if you're not, *GET IT*. It's great fun. Even you, Nana. If I've got a grandmother who's 'with it' enough to be using *Acronyms* in her e-mails, you're only a few steps away from hitting up the video games. You'll be Punkbusting n00bz in no time. :)
Does anyone ever browse the things I link? Just curious.
Time is short. More studying, more playing games. Ta!
-N
Comments:
Take a deep breath...Whe kids ask me "how long did you go to school", like your youngest sister did no less than 24 hours ago apropo nothing right in the middle of Mass, and I say 12 years after high school, they always say right back, "TWELVE YEARS??!" I do remember wondering if I could get to the end. The toughest time was when I was just getting started back in undergrad after finishing the army draft thing. I felt old, out of it and too late. The kids in school were, well, kids. I was working nights stocking shelves in a store with a group of vets that were supposed to be trying to go to school during the day. I was the only one who stuck it out. And after 4 years, they were still stocking shelves and I was going to Med School. Don't think of this as denial and delay. Think of it as an investment in yourself. Better credentials, better job, prospects, pay. Only you know if this is something that will help you or will satisfy you in the long run, but don't sell yourself short. Dad
# posted by 
: June 29, 2004 at 12:25 AM
: June 29, 2004 at 12:25 AM
I like the plan, never do anything that doesn't make you happy again. I'm in total support. In fact, i reccomend you start saving up that bank i KNOW youa r erolling in, so when the terms of yoru fellowship are over, you can take... a month.. or a year... or 2... off. Travel, be a bum do whatever. You are only young once and all. And frankly, you ar about to enter the part of life when people will look at you funny for it. I know that if i told someone i was excited about living out of my back pack for the forseeable future, sleeping ina different city every night, no one would really be shocked. It's weirder when you are older, and can't get away with crashing youth hostels. So make the most of it eh? Save your dollars and trade them in for experience!--Sandlin
ps- and do like dad says, be cool stay in school. for now.
Post a Comment
ps- and do like dad says, be cool stay in school. for now.
# posted by : June 29, 2004 at 9:08 PM
: June 29, 2004 at 9:08 PM